The past few months, years, even the last decade has been a very turbulent time. We have seen pandemics, wars, riots, and divisions on an unprecedented scale. It is tempting for us to think that these “adult” things have no effect on our children, but the truth is that they are very in tune to the level of stress and chaos in the world around them, even if they don’t fully understand what’s causing it. I’d like to put out three suggestions to help parents guide their children through this time.
- Have open, age appropriate, discussions about what is going on in the world and let your children know that you are available for questions. One way to know what would be appropriate for your child’s individual level of maturity is to carefully listen to the questions that they are asking. Don’t try to explain everything at once, rather, let their questions determine what things you focus on. For example if a five year old asks why they can’t visit grandma you should focus first on a very simple explanation of sickness and how it spreads. If they ask a question about what the difference between a virus and a cold is however, that would indicate that they are ready for a slightly more complicated conversation. Remember to answer clearly and concisely, and don’t be afraid to admit when you don’t know something.
- Manage other areas of stress in your child’s life, including your level of stress. Children can get overwhelmed when too many changes are happening in their lives at once, and they don’t have a clear idea of what is going to happen next. Try to lower the uncertainty in their lives by having a consistent daily and weekly schedule, and by letting them know what is going to happen in the near future when possible. A simple schedule can do a lot to reduce the chaos in their lives and yours. If you are stressed and worried constantly then your children will be able to feel it, despite your attempts to hide it. Starting practices like meditation, walking, or yoga with your children could be a great way to manage stress for the whole family.
- Get your children involved in something greater than themselves. The best way to ease anxiety about things we can’t control is to influence the things we can. Do you have a ten year old that loves crafts? Teach them how to sew masks. Do you have an eloquently spoken teenager? Encourage them to write letters to local government agencies in support of policies that can precent police brutality. There are so many small things like this that can allow children to feel not only less helpless, but more happy as they serve those around them.
Resources:
ysa.org/covid/
shoppeblack.us/2016/12/black-children-businesses/
Craysy Life 